Born in Ottawa, Ontario, Jade Carpenter is every bit as rare and beautiful as the precious stone she’s named after. This is one precious stone that will turn your precious into stone. She played “Hot Girl” on Skins, but she wouldn’t really be showing off some skin until she appeared on Spike TV’s Blue Mountain State. The appearance of Carpenter’s mountains in Blue Mountain State will send your blues packing. She can be seen engaging in a dorm room three-way, with another lovely lady and the luckiest quarter-back in NCAA history. It turns out NCAA stands for nice cans and asses. Jade is on top riding during the menage à trois, and you’ll be sporting a statuette in your menage à trousers. The team’s mascot is desperate to get into the room, but all members agree that in this case, three’s company, four’s a crowd. Karen Carpenter sang that she was on top of the world looking down on creation, most fans would rather be on top of Jade Carpenter, looking down at masturbation. Fans would love to get laid by Jade dressed up as a maid. Who wouldn’t want to dive head first into that lady marmalade?